Finding My Voice: Living with Esophageal Cancer

"A journey through treatment, faith, and finding strength"

  • Treatment update: week by week

    Treatment update: week by week

    This past stretch of treatment has been a mix of small victories and some really tough days. I’ve now had 5 radiation treatments with no issues at all, which feels like a big blessing. On the chemo side, I’ve completed 3 treatments, and that’s where I’m really starting to feel things in my body

    How chemo days feel

    My chemo days are Wednesdays, and I’ve started to notice a pattern. I usually get through the actual treatment day fairly well, but by the weekend and into Monday evening the side effects catch up with me. That’s when the nausea hits and I feel very weak, like someone slowly turned down the dimmer switch on my energy.

    Thanksgiving on low energy

    Thanksgiving was especially challenging this year. It was just my husband and me, and he didn’t make a lot of food, which actually worked out because I couldn’t eat much anyway. I felt sick to my stomach and could only manage a few bites at first, then later in the day I was able to eat a little more, but everything took effort.

    A good day that still cost energy

    On Saturday, we had some family over to watch a football game, and I genuinely enjoyed it. It felt good to have people around, to laugh, and to focus on something other than appointments and side effects. But as the day went on, I could feel my energy draining fast, and by the time everyone left, I was completely wiped out. It really seems like the more people I’m around, the faster my energy disappears.

    Today’s feelings

    Today I’m feeling the full weight of all of this. The fatigue is deep, the body pains are louder, and even simple things feel heavy. The tears just want to fall, and I have no idea why today of all days, because on paper it’s just a normal day. There is nothing special about it, and yet my emotions are right at the surface.

    Learning my new limits

    This is one of the strangest parts of treatment: realizing that my social battery and physical energy are not what they used to be, and that my emotions have a mind of their own. I can be happy one moment and start crying for no reason the next, and I don’t know how to fix it or make it stop. I love being around people and I want to stay “normal,” but right now my body and my heart have a much shorter limit. For now, I’m trying to listen to my body, let the tears come when they need to, rest when I can, and hold onto the small good moments, even when they come with a crash afterward.

  • A Week of Unexpected Turns

    When Life Tests Your Resilience

    Last Wednesday, I started my first chemotherapy treatment. For days, I had built this moment up in my mind—imagined the struggle, mentally prepared for the worst, fortified myself with courage I wasn’t sure I had. Instead, I slept through the whole thing.

    The Benadryl they give you before chemo is no joke. It wrapped me in a gentle fog, and I drifted off into what felt like the most needed sleep I’d had in weeks. When I woke up, it was over. No drama. No crisis. Just a medical experience that turned out to be far less terrifying than I’d feared. Thursday following my infusion brought no complications, no nausea, no weakness, no complications that I’d been warned about. I felt almost normal, which seemed like winning the lottery.

    And then Thursday evening happened.

    My husband couldn’t breathe properly. That tight chest feeling, the dizziness—the kind of symptoms you see in movies but pray will never touch your own life. We rushed to the emergency room, and what we thought might the flu or a passing condition turned into something far more serious. Congestive heart failure with multiple blood clots in his lungs. The words felt unreal, like someone else’s medical nightmare that had somehow gotten mixed up with our file.

    Friday brought surgery. They needed to remove some of the clots, and I spent the entire day at the hospital—the kind of all-consuming vigil where time moves differently. Hours felt like both minutes and days. I held my phone, called people, tried to eat something I couldn’t taste, and waited for my husband to come through it. Around him, I tried to be strong. I was his rock while mine was crumbling underneath me.

    By late Friday afternoon, exhaustion set in—but it was a different kind than what I’ve read about from chemo. This was the bone-deep fatigue that comes from fear, stress, and love all tangled together. Was it the chemotherapy beginning its assault on my body, or was it the emotional weight of nearly losing someone you love? I honestly couldn’t tell anymore. The line between what chemo does and what crisis does became impossible to draw.

    Saturday came with relief. I was unable to visit in the morning, I was too weak, too drained. Instead, I stayed home, feeling guilty for not being there, grateful he was safe, and completely hollowed out.

     That afternoon he was stable enough to come home. We made it through the discharge process, got him settled, and finally exhaled.

    This week hasn’t gone the way I planned.

    I started it as a cancer patient beginning her treatment journey—ready for a manageable medical challenge. I’m ending it as a man whose husband had a serious condition that appeared out of nowhere. A caregiver now, in addition to being a patient. He seems to be doing very well, but the caregiver in me needs make sure he is taken care of.

    Someone told me this week that stress weakens your immune system, which is the last thing anyone undergoing chemotherapy needs. I’m trying not to think about that. I’m trying to focus on the fact that my husband is home and stable. I’m trying to remember that the chemo went better than expected. I’m trying to be gentle with myself for being exhausted.

    Some weeks test you. This week has tested me and my family in ways I couldn’t have imagined just days ago. But we’re still here. We’re still moving forward. And somehow, that feels like enough.

  • The Midnight Hospital Run

    It’s 1 a.m. on Tuesday, and I’m back in the hospital. After two days of almost no pain, it came crashing back — a deep, twisting ache in my stomach that made it hard to breathe. I was scared something had gone wrong with the feeding tube or the port. They checked everything: the tube, the incisions, the port site under my collarbone. The doctors said both looked good, that the pain was just part of healing. “Normal,” they said — though nothing about this feels normal.

    Last night, one of the incision sites on my stomach started bleeding — a dark, purplish red that made my heart race. It’s strange how a color can make you panic. I messaged the doctor, who told me to use butterfly strips and hold pressure to stop the bleeding, and to watch for new abdominal pressure or lightheadedness. I did exactly what he said, trying to stay calm, breathing slowly, counting each inhale and exhale.

    Of course, I looked it up online — and according to Dr. Google, it could be internal bleeding. I know, I know. I shouldn’t check. But it’s hard not to when every twinge feels like it could mean something more.

    I’m still only managing one jug of tube food a day, but I’m eating small meals on my own — soups, soft foods, little bites I can handle. It feels good to taste something again, even when I’m not really hungry. My body seems confused — tired but restless, healing but hurting.

    Yesterday was my first radiation consult. It’s official now: 23 sessions, Monday through Friday, for five weeks. My first chemotherapy is set for November 12th, and on November 17th I’ll go back for measurements and markings for the radiation machine. They’ll literally draw on my skin where the beams will target with a paint marker. The tech said it won’t wash off but will fade over time. I told her I might as well collect a few — temporary tattoos courtesy of modern medicine.

    It’s a strange thing — to know your calendar is full of treatments instead of plans. I used to schedule work meetings and vacations. Now I schedule survival. No more NOLA trip in the spring. No trip home for a while. Just appointments, countdowns, and recovery days.

    Still, I’m trying to find rhythm in all of this — the slow progress, the small victories. The bruises are fading, even if the pain lingers. Healing, I’m learning, is messy. It bleeds. It aches. It tests every ounce of patience I have.

  • Inside a Day with Esophageal Cancer

    When I heard the words “You have esophageal cancer” in October 2025, it felt like the ground gave out beneath me. Nothing prepares you for that moment — not the weeks of testing, not the endless scans, not even the quiet hope that it’s something else. Everything changed in an instant.

    On October 30th, I had two procedures: a port placed in my chest for upcoming chemotherapy and a G-tube placed in my stomach to prepare for the day when eating might become too painful. My doctors told me the tube would help make sure I stay strong once treatments start. Right now, I can still eat normally — though food doesn’t hold the same appeal. My appetite is weak, my stomach feels unsettled, and I’m not really hungry anymore. So, each day, I try to do at least two containers of tube feeding to keep my nutrition up. It’s strange to say, has to be done.

    The G-tube site still feels raw. There are three large cuts around it — deep, bruised, and tender — from where the surgeons helped guide it into place. Some days, the pain dulls to an ache; other days, it catches me off guard, a sharp sting that reminds me just how new all of this still is. I can’t sleep on my side yet, and my back is killing me from so many nights spent flat on my back. It’s hard to find a position that doesn’t make me aware of the tube, the port, or the soreness in my chest.

    The port feels strange — not painful, exactly, but alien. There’s a small cut where it was placed, and another near my collarbone. When I touch it, I can feel the wire looping up and around the bone, dipping down into the artery. It feels “funky,” like something mechanical has been tucked inside me — which, in a way, it has. It’s meant to make things easier once chemotherapy starts, but it’s still unsettling knowing there’s a line running directly into my  jugular vein.

    I’m supposed to walk for thirty minutes a day to keep my strength up, but right now, that feels impossible. My energy is gone before I’ve even finished setting up the feeding bag. I try — I tell myself I’ll start tomorrow — but my body just says no. Fatigue is its own kind of weight, heavier than I expected, wrapping around me like a fog.

    The hardest moments come when I look at my two fur babies, Bella and Daisy. They’re Morkies — small, loving, and full of energy — and they don’t understand why I keep pushing them away. They just want to curl up on my lap like always, to snuggle against me, but I can’t risk them bumping the tube. The guilt hits hard every time I see the confusion in their eyes. I try to pet them gently, to let them know it’s okay, but sometimes I just break down and cry. My emotions are everywhere lately — one moment I’m determined, the next I’m exhausted, and sometimes I’m just overwhelmed, and at times don’t know if I can do this.

    Each day feels like learning to live inside a body I barely recognize. I’m managing work from home — scheduling for medical offices — but it’s tough. I have to stop often to stretch or rest because the pain builds quickly. The normalcy of logging into work helps distract me, but the fatigue is never far behind.

    Still, I remind myself: this is temporary. The pain, the exhaustion, the fear — they’re all part of the process of getting better. I tell myself that every feeding, every careful cleaning of the tube site, every cautious movement is an act of survival.

    Cancer changes everything — the way you see your body, the way you measure time, the way you find strength. Some days, I don’t feel strong at all. But even on those days, I’m still here. I’m still showing up. I’m still doing what I can — even if that just means lying still, taking deep breaths, and letting myself feel it all.

    This isn’t the life I expected, but it’s the one I’m living right now. And through the pain, the fatigue, and the tears, I hold onto one simple truth: I’m still fighting. I’m still healing. I’m still me.

  • Facing the Journey: My Experience with Esophageal Cancer, a G-Tube, and a Port

    Life has a way of throwing unexpected challenges our way, and for me, it came in the form of a diagnosis I never anticipated: esophageal cancer. When I first heard the words, I felt a whirlwind of emotions—fear, uncertainty, and a sense of being unprepared. But along with the fear came a resolve: I was going to face this head-on, one step at a time.

    One of the first hurdles after diagnosis was preparing for treatment. I learned I would need chemo and radiation, followed by surgery to remove the lower part of my esophagus. To make this possible, my doctors recommended two procedures: a gastrostomy (G) feeding tube and a port.

    The G-Tube:
    The idea of having a tube inserted directly into my stomach was intimidating at first. I worried about pain, complications, and how it would affect my daily life. The procedure itself was surprisingly quick, and the team was incredibly supportive. The G-tube will become a lifeline, allowing me to get the nutrition I need while my body endures the rigors of treatment. It’s a strange adjustment at first—learning how to feed myself differently, keeping the site clean, and dealing with the new routines—but it’s a small price to pay for staying nourished and strong.

    The Port:
    Next was the port—a small device placed under the skin of my chest to give my doctors easier access for chemotherapy. It sounds scarier than it is. The procedure was straightforward, and it will make treatments much less stressful. No more repeated needle sticks for IVs, just one small port doing all the work. It’s a small thing, but it feels like a tangible ally in this fight.

    Going through these procedures has taught me more about resilience, patience, and the human body than I ever expected. There were moments of fear, moments of discomfort, and moments when it all feels overwhelming. But there are also moments of gratitude: for a team of skilled doctors, for friends and family supporting me, and for the tiny victories every day.

    This journey isn’t one I would have chosen, but it’s shaping me in ways I never imagined. If you’re reading this and facing your own health challenge, know this: it’s okay to be scared. It’s okay to grieve the life you expected. But it’s also okay to fight, to adapt, and to find strength in the smallest victories.

    Every tube, every port, every treatment is a step forward. And while the path is not easy, I’m walking it with hope, courage, and the determination to come out stronger on the other side.

  • Did Jesus Turn From His Mission When He Cried, “My God, My God, Why Have You Forsaken Me?”?

    One of the most haunting and debated moments in Scripture comes from Jesus’ cry on the cross, as recorded in the Gospels of Matthew (27:46) and Mark (15:34): “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” which translates to “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” At first glance, these words can be interpreted as Jesus feeling abandoned by God, potentially turning away from His mission to save humanity.

    Such an interpretation suggests a moment of crisis, doubt, or failure. How could the Messiah—fully divine and fully committed to his redemptive work—express such despair just before His death? This troubling perspective can lead some to question whether Jesus’ mission was compromised, or if He was overwhelmed by the weight of His suffering to the point of feeling forsaken by God.

    A Deeper Look at the Textual and Historical Context

    Understanding this cry requires looking carefully at the context and the original meaning. Jesus’ words are not a spontaneous lament but are a deliberate quotation from Psalm 22:1, an ancient Hebrew psalm that begins with a cry of abandonment yet ends in triumphant trust and vindication.

    Psalm 22 is a profound prophetic text rich with Messianic imagery, describing suffering, mockery, and eventual deliverance. Jesus’ use of this psalm is significant because it situates His suffering within the framework of God’s redemptive plan foretold in Scripture. Rather than turning away from His divine mission, Jesus points directly to the fulfillment of prophecy. His suffering is purposeful, fulfilling what was written long before His birth.

    Contrasting Gospel Accounts: Matthew and Mark vs. Luke and John

    Interestingly, the different Gospel writers portray Jesus’ last moments on the cross with varying emphases:

    • Matthew and Mark record this cry of forsakenness, emphasizing the depth of Jesus’ human suffering and anguish.
    • Luke, on the other hand, does not include this cry. Instead, Luke highlights Jesus’ focus on forgiveness and trust: Jesus asks the Father to forgive those who crucify Him (Luke 23:34), assures the repentant criminal of salvation (Luke 23:43), and commits His spirit to the Father with peace (Luke 23:46).
    • John presents Jesus’ final words as “It is finished” (John 19:30), affirming the completion of His mission with a victorious tone rather than one of abandonment.

    These variations emphasize not contradiction but the multi-faceted nature of Jesus’ experience—both fully human in His pain and fully divine in His mission and trust in the Father.

    Why Jesus Was Not Forsaken or Abandoning His Mission

    Jesus’ cry must be seen as an expression of the real and profound human experience of suffering and separation he endured on behalf of humanity. This experience of forsakenness was the weight of sin placed upon Him, symbolizing the separation humans deserve because of sin, rather than a literal abandonment by the Father within the Trinity.

    By quoting Psalm 22, Jesus was expressing both the agony of His suffering and His unwavering faith. Psalm 22’s trajectory moves from despair to hope, from death to life, culminating in God’s deliverance and glory (Psalm 22:22-31). Jesus, knowing this scripture well, invites the witnesses—and readers across history—to understand His death as the fulfillment of God’s powerful plan for salvation.

    The Powerful Message Behind the Cry

    Jesus’ words on the cross reveal the depth of His sacrifice. They show that He truly entered into the most broken aspects of human existence, even to the feeling of abandonment, so that He could restore humanity’s relationship with God. It was not a moment of failure, but the final act of obedience and love.

    Furthermore, His quoting of Psalm 22 signals to the early followers and future readers that His suffering was not random or meaningless but deeply rooted in the Scriptures pointing to the Messiah.

    Conclusion

    Jesus’ cry, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” must not be misread as turning from His mission or losing faith. Instead, it is a profound fulfillment of Scripture, depicting the ultimate cost of salvation and the Messiah’s faithful obedience to the Father’s redemptive plan.

    This cry is a bridge from human suffering to divine victory, from forsakenness to fulfillment, inviting all who hear it to recognize the Messiah who truly bore the weight of the world’s sin and accomplished salvation as promised in the Old Testament.

  • The LGBTQ Community Must Stand United Against Unprecedented Government Threats: Confronting the Data and Laws Behind Today’s Crisis

    In the face of systematic legislative attacks and federal rollbacks targeting LGBTQ rights, the community confronts the most comprehensive assault on its existence in modern American history. The data reveals a stark reality: with 953 anti-LGBTQ bills under consideration across 49 states in 2025 and the implementation of sweeping executive orders at the federal level, this represents a coordinated campaign to systematically eliminate LGBTQ people from public life. The numbers alone tell a chilling story, but behind each statistic lies a human being whose fundamental right to exist with dignity hangs in the balance.

    The Unprecedented Scale of Legislative Warfare
    Record-Breaking Anti-LGBTQ Legislation

    The 2025 legislative session has produced the most concentrated attack on LGBTQ rights in documented history. Trans Legislation Tracker data shows that 953 bills targeting transgender and gender non-conforming people are under consideration across the country, with 120 already passed into law. This represents a staggering escalation from previous years, with the numbersd just two years ago to 75 national bills at the federal level in 2025.

    The geographic spread of these attacks is equally alarming. Texas leads with 131 bills under consideration, followed by the federal level with 75 bills, Missouri with 67 bills, and Iowa with 35 bills. These numbers represent not merely legislative proposals but active efforts to criminalize LGBTQ existence, with 23 of the 25 states with gender-affirming care bans including professional and civil penalties for healthcare practitioners, including six states with felony penalties.

    Breakdown by Category of Attack

    The legislative assault follows a deliberate pattern designed to eliminate LGBTQ people from all aspects of public life. Education and healthcare bills comprise approximately half of all legislation considered in 2025. Healthcare restrictions affect 122 bills seeking to ban gender-affirming care, while 77 bills target bathroom access for transgender people. Perhaps most concerning are the 73 bills designed to eliminate legal recognition of transgender people entirely, effectively attempting to erase their existence from official documentation.

    Twenty-seven states have now passed bans on gender-affirming healthcare for transgender children and teenagers, affecting an estimated 40% of transgender youth ages 13 to 17. These laws vary in scope, with some states making it a felony crime to provide certain gender-affirming care to minors, while others prohibit the use of public funds. The Williams Institute data reveals that 24 states have enacted laws banning access to gender-affirming care for transgender youth, with 19 of these bans enacted in 2023 alone.

    Bathroom restrictions have similarly proliferated, with 19 states now enforcing laws or policies that prevent transgender individuals from using restrooms that align with their gender identity. Research from the Williams Institute demonstrates that 78,400 additional transgender youth live in states where bathroom or facilities bans were pending in the 2024 legislative session.

    Federal Executive Actions and Their Impact
    Project 2025 Implementation

    The Trump administration has systematically implemented Project 2025’s anti-LGBTQ agenda through a series of executive orders that rescind protections and ban federal recognition of gender identity. More than 75% of proposed policies in Project 2025 pertaining to the limitation of LGBTQ+ freedoms have been implemented by the Trump administration within its first month.

    Key implementations include Executive Order 14168, which officially recognizes only two genders, male and female, and Executive Order 14151, which reviewed all government contracts to eliminate those supporting LGBTQ+ rights. The Gender Policy Council, focused on advocating for gender equality, was dissolved through Executive Order 14148. These actions represent a coordinated effort to strip away decades of hard-won civil rights protections.

    Military and Federal Employment

    The military ban on transgender service members affects approximately 4,240 service members diagnosed with gender dysphoria, representing 0.2% of military personnel. Active-duty personnel had until June 6, 2025, to self-identify for voluntary separation, while reserve members had until July 7, 2025. After these deadlines, the military departments initiated involuntary separation procedures.

    The executive orders remove workplace protections for nearly 14,000 transgender federal employees and over 100,000 LGBTQ employees of federal contractors. Executive Order 13672, which prohibited anti-LGBT discrimination by federal contractors, has been rescinded, eliminating protections that had been in place since the Obama administration.

    Healthcare and Federal Benefits

    The administration has directed federal agencies to withhold funds from medical providers and institutions that provide gender-affirming medical treatments to anyone under 19. This threatens to shut down access to essential healthcare that is already out of reach for many, leading some provider networks to prematurely cancel appointments and announce they are ceasing care altogether.

    Federal regulations prohibiting discrimination in healthcare under Section 1557 of the Affordable Care Act have been challenged, with a Mississippi federal judge blocking enforcement of new HHS anti-discrimination rules for transgender patients. This nationwide block allows states to enact legislation limiting transgender access to healthcare.

    The Human Cost: Mental Health and Safety Data
    Suicide and Mental Health Statistics

    The data on LGBTQ youth mental health reveals the devastating impact of legislative attacks and societal discrimination. The Trevor Project’s 2024 National Survey found that 39% of LGBTQ+ young people seriously considered attempting suicide in the past year, including 46% of transgender and nonbinary young people. More than 1 in 10 (12%) LGBTQ+ young people attempted suicide in the past year.

    Research demonstrates that discrimination significantly increases suicide risk. LGBT youth who reported experiencing discrimination based on minority sexual orientation were significantly more likely to report self-harm (25.0% vs. 6.3%) and suicidal ideation (23.9% vs. 6.3%) compared to those who had not experienced such discrimination. Among gay or lesbian youth, 37% seriously considered suicide and 19% attempted, compared to 14% and 6% respectively among straight youth.

    LGBTQ+ young people of color face even higher risks, with The Trevor Project’s 2023 survey finding that nearly all LGBTQ+ young people of color reported higher rates of attempting suicide than their white peers: 22% of Native/Indigenous youth, 18% of Middle Eastern/Northern African youth, 16% of Black youth, 17% of multiracial youth, and 15% of Latinx youth attempted suicide, compared to 11% of white youth.

    Violence and Harassment Data

    GLAAD’s 2025 ALERT Desk report tracked 932 anti-LGBTQ incidents in 49 US states and the District of Columbia between May 2024 and May 2025, equivalent to 2.5 incidents every day. Violent attacks resulted in 84 injuries and 10 deaths. Over the past year, 52% of all incidents targeted transgender and gender non-conforming people (485 out of 932 incidents).

    The data shows a 14% increase year-over-year in incidents targeting transgender people. This coincides with at least four executive orders from the Trump administration that specifically target transgender Americans and follows $215 million in political ads during the 2024 campaign targeting trans people.

    Physical harm affects 23% of LGBTQ+ young people, who reported being physically threatened or harmed in the past year due to their sexual orientation or gender identity. Twenty-eight percent of transgender and nonbinary young people reported physical threats or harm due to their gender identity. Those who experienced physical harm attempted suicide at nearly triple the rate of those who did not.

    Impact of Political Environment

    The political climate has severely impacted LGBTQ+ youth wellbeing, with 90% of LGBTQ+ young people reporting that recent politics negatively impacted their well-being. Forty-five percent of transgender and nonbinary young people reported that they or their family have considered moving to a different state because of LGBTQ+-related politics and laws.

    Research consistently shows that LGBTQ+ young people who reported living in very accepting communities attempted suicide at less than half the rate of those who reported living in very unaccepting communities. This data underscores the critical importance of supportive environments and the harmful impact of discriminatory legislation.

    Supreme Court Cases

    The Supreme Court has agreed to hear multiple cases that will determine the future of LGBTQ rights. In United States v. Skrmetti, decided June 18, 2025, the Court upheld Tennessee’s ban on gender-affirming care for minors in a 6-3 decision, ruling that the ban did not violate the equal protection clause of the 14th Amendment. This ruling affects transgender youth in Tennessee and Kentucky and may embolden lawmakers in other states with similar bans.

    The Court has also agreed to hear two cases on transgender athletes for the 2025-26 term: Little v. Hecox from Idaho and West Virginia v. B.P.J. These cases will consider whether state laws restricting participation in girls’ and women’s sports to athletes born female violate the equal protection clause or Title IX.

    Additionally, the Supreme Court agreed to consider a challenge to Colorado’s law banning conversion therapy for minors, a case that could have major implications for the 23 states that currently ban the practice.

    Federal Court Challenges

    Multiple federal lawsuits challenge the Trump administration’s anti-LGBTQ executive orders. In PFLAG v. Trump, filed by the ACLU, Lambda Legal, and other organizations, two transgender young adults and five transgender adolescents and their families challenge the executive order directing federal agencies to withhold funds from medical providers offering gender-affirming care to people under 19.

    The Biden administration’s Title IX rules expanding protections for LGBTQ+ students were struck down nationwide after federal judge Danny C. Reeves found they overstepped presidential authority. This ruling affects the 1,500-page regulation that had been blocked in 26 states following legal challenges by Republican states.

    State-Level Resistance and Protections
    Conversion Therapy Bans

    Despite federal rollbacks, 27 states plus the District of Columbia, Puerto Rico, and more than 100 municipalities have instituted bans on conversion therapy. These bans protect LGBTQ youth from practices that The Trevor Project’s research shows more than double an LGBTQ+ young person’s odds of attempting suicide.

    However, challenges remain significant. A 2023 report by The Trevor Project identified more than 1,300 active conversion therapy practitioners still operating in all U.S. states except Vermont and Hawaii. The Supreme Court’s agreement to hear the Colorado conversion therapy case could undermine these protections nationwide.

    Shield Laws and Sanctuary Policies

    Thirteen states and the District of Columbia have passed “shield” laws protecting access to gender-affirming care. These laws protect families and healthcare providers who facilitate access to gender-affirming care from prosecution in states where such care has been restricted.

    Maine and Rhode Island joined this group in 2024, while states like California and Illinois have explicit protections for transgender youth that could be reversed if pending legislation passes. These shield laws represent one of the few bright spots in an otherwise dire legislative landscape.

    Local Government Resistance

    Cities across Republican-led states are finding creative ways to resist flag bans and other anti-LGBTQ legislation. Salt Lake City adopted the Sego Belonging Flag featuring LGBTQ colors as an official city flag. Boise designated its Pride flag as an official city flag to continue flying it despite Idaho’s statewide ban. Missoula, Montana, adopted the Pride flag as its only official city flag.

    However, these efforts face legal challenges. Idaho’s Republican attorney general has warned Boise’s mayor to remove the Pride flag or face penalties when the state legislature returns to session.

    The Strategic Nature of Current Attacks
    Divide and Conquer Tactics

    The current legislative assault employs a deliberate “divide and conquer” strategy designed to fracture LGBTQ solidarity by focusing initial attacks primarily on transgender people. This tactic exploits the reality that transgender people, comprising approximately 1% of the population, can be more easily scapegoated while potentially creating the illusion that cisgender lesbian, gay, and bisexual people might remain safe.

    This strategy is particularly insidious because it attempts to rewrite the history of the LGBTQ rights movement, which began with transgender women of color like Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera leading the Stonewall uprising[previous blog text]. Any attempt to abandon transgender community members represents a betrayal of the movement’s foundations.

    Economic and Professional Targeting

    The attacks extend beyond individual rights to target the economic foundation of LGBTQ advocacy. Project 2025 laid out plans to review government contracts with entities that enforce a “woke agenda,” including those supporting LGBTQ+ rights. The Gender Policy Council, focused on advocating for gender equality and equal pay, was eliminated.

    Professional penalties have been built into many state laws. Twenty-three of the 25 states with gender-affirming care bans include professional and civil penalties for healthcare practitioners, with six states imposing felony penalties. This creates a chilling effect that extends far beyond the specific prohibitions, discouraging healthcare providers from serving LGBTQ patients even in areas not explicitly covered by the bans.

    Unity as Strategic Necessity
    Historical Lessons from Successful Resistance

    The data demonstrates that unified resistance works. Florida’s experience in 2025 provides a powerful example: through sustained advocacy and organizing, every anti-LGBTQ bill filed in the 2025 legislative session was defeated. This success came despite facing the largest Republican supermajority in Florida’s history and a hostile federal climate.

    The victory wasn’t accidental. As Equality Florida noted, “We knew the only way to defeat these bad bills was to fight every fight, show up in every room they’re debating our rights, and always outnumber the opposition”. In 2024, Florida advocates stopped or neutralized 21 of 22 anti-LGBTQ bills, demonstrating that sustained, unified resistance can overcome even the most determined opposition.

    The Power of Coalition Building

    Research on successful social movements demonstrates that coalition building across different marginalized communities creates the most effective resistance. Studies show that successful coalitions form around “shared narratives that formed the backbone of movement coalitions” and work together “against common opponents or enemies”[previous blog text].

    The current attacks on LGBTQ people connect to broader patterns of discrimination affecting multiple communities. Labor organizations recognize this connection, with one noting that “LGBTQ+ rights are not separate from workers’ rights. They are workers’ rights”[previous blog text]. This understanding enables coalitions that can leverage the combined strength of multiple movements.

    Community Defense Networks

    Local communities have demonstrated remarkable creativity in developing immediate protective measures. Grassroots mutual aid groups provide essential services like binders, hormones, and financial support when official systems fail[previous blog text]. These networks create immediate relief while longer-term advocacy efforts work toward systemic change.

    Safety training programs, rapid response networks for community members facing harassment or discrimination, and safe spaces where people can access resources and build support networks all represent practical steps that communities can take to protect vulnerable members.

    The Path Forward: Strategic Unity in Action
    Immediate Protective Actions

    The data makes clear that immediate action is necessary to protect LGBTQ community members facing unprecedented threats. Communities must develop comprehensive safety plans that address both individual and collective security needs.

    Emergency response systems for community members facing harassment or discrimination require coordination between legal advocates, mental health professionals, and community organizers. Given that 50% of LGBTQ+ young people who wanted mental health care in the past year were unable to get it, developing alternative support systems becomes critically important.

    Legal clinics and know-your-rights trainings become essential as federal protections are eliminated. Understanding what protections remain under state and local law, how to document discrimination, and when to seek legal assistance helps community members navigate an increasingly hostile legal landscape.

    Long-term Movement Building

    The scale of current attacks requires long-term strategic thinking about movement building and political power. Electoral engagement must extend beyond federal races to include state and local elections where many of the most harmful policies originate.

    Voter registration and mobilization efforts must prioritize communities most affected by anti-LGBTQ legislation. Research shows that LGBTQ people represent nearly 8% of the adult U.S. population and 22% of millennials[previous blog text]. When effectively organized, this represents significant political power.

    Political engagement must also include running for office. Many of the most harmful policies emerge from local school boards, city councils, and state legislatures where small numbers of committed candidates can make substantial differences.

    Building Broader Coalitions

    The data on intersectional impacts underscores the importance of building coalitions that center the experiences of the most marginalized community members. Black, Indigenous, people of color, disabled, noncitizen, and low-income LGBTQ people remain “the most vulnerable members of the LGBTQ community”[previous blog text].

    Effective coalition building requires more than tokenism. Research reveals that movements must avoid “treating marginalized constituencies as mere token participants rather than full partners” and instead create “opportunities for multiply marginalized people to lead coalitions”[previous blog text].

    Coalition work must also extend beyond LGBTQ-specific organizations to include racial justice organizations, labor unions, environmental groups, and other movements fighting for social justice. These partnerships create sustained pressure for change while building the skills and confidence of community members across different movements.

    The Critical Importance of Sustained Resistance
    Learning from International Examples

    The global context provides both warning and hope. The Global Equality Caucus reports that several countries have recently passed legislation banning conversion practices, including Cyprus, Iceland, Belgium, and Norway. These victories demonstrate that sustained advocacy can achieve protective legislation even in challenging political environments.

    However, the international landscape also reveals the importance of vigilance. Countries that seemed to have strong LGBTQ protections have seen rapid rollbacks when political conditions changed. The U.S. experience demonstrates how quickly decades of progress can be undermined when opponents gain political power.

    The Role of Corporate and Institutional Allies

    Corporate and institutional support becomes increasingly important as government protections are eliminated. However, recent data shows concerning trends in corporate support. Seattle Pride lost major sponsors amid a national pullback from corporate LGBTQ support[Axios Seattle reference], indicating that even previously reliable allies may retreat under political pressure.

    Educational institutions face particular challenges as federal funding threats target diversity, equity, and inclusion programs. Universities and schools that want to maintain inclusive environments must develop strategies that don’t rely solely on federal support or guidance.

    Healthcare institutions similarly face pressure as federal funding restrictions target gender-affirming care. Providers committed to serving LGBTQ patients must develop alternative funding sources and support systems to continue providing essential services.

    Sustaining Hope and Community Connection

    The mental health data underscores the critical importance of maintaining hope and community connection during this crisis. Research consistently shows that LGBTQ+ young people report lower rates of attempting suicide when they have access to LGBTQ+-affirming spaces.

    Creating and maintaining these affirming spaces becomes both a form of resistance and a survival strategy. Community centers, support groups, cultural events, and informal gatherings all contribute to the social fabric that helps community members survive and thrive.

    The data on community acceptance reinforces this point: LGBTQ+ young people living in very accepting communities attempted suicide at less than half the rate of those in very unaccepting communities. Building accepting communities isn’t just nice to have – it’s literally life-saving work.

    Conclusion: The Imperative of United Action

    The comprehensive data reveals the scope and severity of current threats to LGBTQ rights and safety. With 953 anti-LGBTQ bills under consideration across 49 states, systematic federal rollbacks of civil rights protections, and documented increases in violence and harassment, the community faces an existential crisis that demands unified response.

    The statistics tell a stark story: 39% of LGBTQ+ young people seriously considered suicide in the past year, 932 anti-LGBTQ incidents occurred in just one year, and over 100,000 LGBTQ employees of federal contractors have lost workplace protections. Behind each number lies a human being whose fundamental right to exist with dignity is under attack.

    Yet the data also demonstrates the power of unified resistance. Florida’s success in defeating every anti-LGBTQ bill in 2025 shows what’s possible when communities organize effectively. The 27 states that maintain conversion therapy bans provide protection for vulnerable youth despite federal hostility. Local governments finding creative ways to maintain Pride flags and inclusive policies demonstrate that resistance can emerge from unexpected places.

    The path forward requires acknowledging that this crisis affects all LGBTQ people, but not equally. Transgender people, particularly transgender youth and people of color, face the most severe and immediate threats. Black, Indigenous, and other people of color within the LGBTQ community continue to experience disproportionate violence and discrimination. Unity cannot mean asking the most vulnerable to wait their turn for safety.

    The choice facing the LGBTQ community is stark: stand together as a unified force committed to collective liberation, or allow opponents to divide and isolate the most vulnerable among us. The data makes clear that opponents fear our collective power – that’s why they work so hard to divide us. When we stand together, building deep coalitions with other movements for justice, we represent an unstoppable force for equality and human dignity.

    The government threats facing LGBTQ people in 2025 represent the most serious challenge to our community’s rights and safety in decades. They will not be defeated by individual action or partial resistance. Victory requires that we refuse to abandon each other, that we build the broadest possible coalitions for justice, and that we commit to sustained organizing, legal advocacy, direct action, and political engagement at every level of society.

    The teenagers facing harassment in schools, the adults losing healthcare access, the federal employees stripped of workplace protections, and the service members forced out of the military are all part of one fight for one goal: the right to exist with dignity and safety. The data shows us the scope of the challenge, but it also shows us our power when we stand together. In unity, we find not just survival, but the strength to build the just and inclusive society that we all deserve.

  • Now Is the Time: Standing Strong Together in God’s Power

    Church, now is the time to recognize a deep spiritual truth: when God is about to do something great, resistance rises. The doubts we wrestle with, the unexpected struggles we face, the illnesses, the fears—these are not signals of failure. They are evidence that we are walking in God’s purpose. The opposition we feel is proof that the enemy is threatened by what God is stirring in us and through our beautiful, diverse LGBTQ+ community.

    When the Devil sees the good we are building together, he wants to distract us, divide us, and discourage us. He would have us believe that our hardships are signs we’re off track, unworthy, or alone. But church, hear me: we are not alone, and we have not been abandoned.

    The Scriptures remind us:
    “Be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His power. Put on all the armor that God gives, so you can stand up against the devil’s tricks.”
    (Ephesians 6:10-11, NLV)

    We are equipped to stand not just as individuals, but as a family. We defend one another, lift each other up, and refuse to let anyone fall behind. That’s what it means to be the body of Christ—especially in a movement that cherishes every person’s God-given dignity and gifts.

    Paul assures us:
    “God did not give us a spirit of fear. He gave us a spirit of power and of love and of a good mind.”
    (2 Timothy 1:7, NLV)

    That is our inheritance. Power. Love. Clarity of mind. When you wonder if you’re enough, if you belong, or if you can keep going—remember, you are operating in God’s purpose. Those fears and challenges? They are a sign that something wonderful is coming, that God is about to do something mighty through our church and our movement for justice.

    Let’s stand together—bolder, braver, and more united than ever. The world needs our light. God’s hand is on our work for dignity, justice, and radical love. The Bible encourages us:
    “Let us not get tired of doing good. At the right time we will gather a crop if we do not give up.”
    (Galatians 6:9, NLV)

    Church don’t lose heart. God is moving among us, and greater things are just ahead. Trust the process, stand tall together, and let love lead the way. The resistance we face is a sign: we are on holy ground. And God is doing something new—through us.

  • Building Community, Creating Change: Launching LGBTQ+ Advocacy in Caldwell County

    In a time when LGBTQ+ voices are being silenced across the country, one rural North Carolina community is taking a stand. On July 2025, I launched the LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County—a grassroots movement determined to transform Western North Carolina into a beacon of inclusion and equality.

    The Current Landscape: Why We Must Act Now

    The statistics paint a sobering picture of the challenges facing LGBTQ+ Americans today. In 2024, the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation tracked 918 anti-LGBTQ+ incidents nationwide, including 18 right here in North Carolina. Legislative efforts continue to target our community’s most vulnerable members, with bills restricting healthcare access for transgender youth, threatening diversity programs in education, and forcing schools to out students to their parents without consent.

    For rural communities like Caldwell County, these challenges are amplified. Research shows that approximately 2.9 to 3.8 million LGBTQ+ Americans live in rural areas, often facing limited access to affirming healthcare, reduced mental health services, and social networks that can intensify both acceptance and rejection. Among LGBTQ+ youth in North Carolina, 56% report considering leaving the state due to discriminatory politics and laws.

    But here’s what opponents of equality don’t understand: LGBTQ+ people aren’t going anywhere. We are your neighbors, coworkers, family members, and friends. In Caldwell County’s population of 84,000, there are likely thousands of LGBTQ+ residents representing every demographic and background.

    A Vision Rooted in Hope and Action

    The formation of the LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County represents more than just another advocacy group—it’s a declaration that rural communities can be forces for progress. Drawing inspiration from successful grassroots movements across Appalachian Tennessee, rural Kentucky, and small towns throughout the South, this organization embodies three core principles that drive lasting change.

    Community Building forms the foundation of sustainable advocacy. When LGBTQ+ people and allies connect, share resources, and support one another, isolation transforms into solidarity. Whether through organizing social events, providing mutual aid, or simply ensuring no one faces discrimination alone, community building creates the relationships that sustain long-term advocacy efforts.

    Education and Advocacy bridges the gap between misunderstanding and acceptance. Research consistently demonstrates that familiarity breeds acceptance—when community members know LGBTQ+ people as fully realized individuals rather than abstract concepts, discrimination becomes much more difficult to maintain. This work involves collaborating with local businesses, schools, healthcare providers, and faith communities to build understanding through authentic relationship-building.

    Political Engagement translates grassroots energy into concrete policy victories. Change begins at the local level, and the LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County understands that supporting inclusive candidates, advocating for protective policies, and ensuring LGBTQ+ voices are heard in government creates the foundation for broader transformation.

    The Power of Rural LGBTQ+ Organizing

    Critics might question whether rural communities can effectively advocate for LGBTQ+ equality, but evidence suggests otherwise. Since 2020, sixteen local governments across North Carolina have passed LGBTQ+ nondiscrimination protections. Polling data reveals that 67% of North Carolinians support such protections, including many residents of traditionally conservative areas.

    Small towns across America are proving that geography doesn’t determine a community’s capacity for inclusion. In rural New Hampshire, queer artists have built safe spaces for community and creativity. Tribal lands in Arizona host Pride events that draw hundreds of participants. Right here in Western North Carolina, organizations like the Campaign for Southern Equality, Tranzmission, and Youth OUTright provide vital resources and support that demonstrate the viability of rural LGBTQ+ advocacy.

    The key insight driving successful rural LGBTQ+ organizing is understanding that effective advocacy starts with authentic storytelling. When LGBTQ+ people share their experiences as neighbors who walk dogs, mow lawns, care for aging parents, and contribute to local businesses, abstract policy debates become personal conversations about community members.

    From Speech to Action: Your Role in This Movement

    The transition from inspirational speech to sustained advocacy requires concrete action from community members across Caldwell County. The LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County offers multiple pathways for involvement that accommodate different comfort levels, skills, and available time commitments.

    Direct Advocacy provides opportunities for those ready to engage in public-facing work. This includes speaking at town halls, writing letters to local newspapers, meeting with elected officials, and organizing community education events. For individuals with lived experience navigating LGBTQ+ challenges, sharing personal stories can be particularly powerful in shifting hearts and minds.

    Behind-the-Scenes Support acknowledges that not everyone feels comfortable in public advocacy roles, but that doesn’t diminish the importance of their contributions. Event planning, social media management, fundraising coordination, research assistance, and administrative support all play crucial roles in organizational success.

    Economic Advocacy leverages the power of consumer choice to create change. Supporting LGBTQ+-owned businesses, advocating for inclusive hiring practices, and encouraging employers to implement nondiscrimination policies demonstrates the economic benefits of equality.

    Mentorship and Support recognizes that LGBTQ+ young people need guidance and encouragement from adults who understand their experiences. Whether through formal mentoring programs or informal support networks, experienced community members can provide invaluable assistance to those just beginning to navigate their identities.

    Building Bridges, Not Walls

    Successful LGBTQ+ advocacy in rural communities requires sophisticated understanding of local culture and values. Rather than approaching potential allies with confrontational rhetoric, the LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County emphasizes shared values like family, community safety, economic prosperity, and individual freedom.

    This approach recognizes that many community members may support LGBTQ+ equality in principle while harboring concerns about implementation or cultural change. By framing advocacy efforts around common ground—everyone deserves the chance to earn a living, be safe in their community, and care for loved ones—organizers can build coalitions that transcend traditional political divides.

    Faith communities represent particularly important potential allies in rural LGBTQ+ advocacy efforts. While some religious institutions have historically opposed LGBTQ+ equality, many others embrace inclusive theology that celebrates human dignity regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity. Building relationships with supportive faith leaders can provide crucial moral authority for advocacy efforts.

    The Moment for Change is Now

    Political momentum for LGBTQ+ equality continues building across North Carolina, even in the face of ongoing challenges. Governor Josh Stein’s proclamation of June as LGBTQ+ Pride Month signals state-level support for inclusion. The longevity of organizations like Equality North Carolina—the nation’s oldest statewide LGBTQ+ organization, founded in 1979—demonstrates the deep roots of advocacy work throughout the state.

    Local victories provide concrete evidence that change is possible. When Hillsborough became the first municipality to pass LGBTQ+ protections after HB142 expired, it proved that even small communities with just 7,000 residents can lead the way toward equality. Major cities like Durham and Greensboro have implemented comprehensive nondiscrimination policies that serve as models for other communities.

    The formation of the LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County occurs at a critical juncture when local action can have outsized impact on broader cultural and political change. As state and federal politics remain contentious, local organizing provides a pathway for creating immediate improvements in LGBTQ+ people’s daily lives.

    Taking the Next Step

    Reading about advocacy and participating in advocacy require different levels of commitment, but both are essential for creating lasting change. For community members inspired by the vision of the LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County, multiple engagement opportunities await.

    Immediate Actions include connecting with organizers through Equality North Carolina at equalitync.org, following the organization’s social media accounts for updates on upcoming events, and engaging in conversations with friends, family, and coworkers about LGBTQ+ issues in your community.

    Ongoing Commitment involves attending monthly meetings, volunteering for specific projects or events, contributing financially to support organizational activities, and advocating with local officials on behalf of LGBTQ+ community members.

    Leadership Development provides opportunities for individuals interested in taking on greater responsibilities within the organization. This might include serving on the leadership team, coordinating specific advocacy campaigns, or representing the organization at community events.

    The launch of the LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County represents more than the formation of another advocacy organization—it embodies the fundamental principle that every community has the capacity for growth, inclusion, and justice. By transforming individual inspiration into collective action, this movement demonstrates that rural communities can be forces for progressive change rather than obstacles to equality.

    The future of LGBTQ+ equality in North Carolina depends on communities like Caldwell County stepping forward to lead. The infrastructure for change exists. The community support is growing. The political moment is ripe for action.

    The only question remaining is whether you’ll join the movement.

    For information about joining the LGBTQ+ Democrats of Caldwell County or supporting LGBTQ+ advocacy efforts throughout North Carolina, visit equalitync.org or email lgbtqofcaldwellcountync@gmail.com. Your voice, your story, and your commitment can help transform your community into a place where all people can thrive authentically.